I had an intuitive hit while on my 2-week content sabbatical. I’m going to share more about myself. In many ways, you and I are on similar journeys. Sure, when it comes to body image and intuitive eating, we may have different healing experiences. But, on many levels, I’m experiencing what you’re experiencing, and you're experiencing what I am. It’s just the way the world works.
I hope that by sharing what’s happening for me, you’ll feel less crazy, less alone and have a more palpable sense of relief. Like, “Phew- someone is going through the same thing I’m going through.” I get how important it is to not feel alone.
So, As we kick off this new year, here are five practices I’m focused on.
#1: Living inside of my body through the lens of my nervous system.
Thankfully, I’m surrounded by some pretty kick-ass healers and educators around trauma, embodiment and self-regulation. I’m becoming very aware of how often my body gets kicked into flight or fight, or when I shut down and freeze. This morning, I created a nest for myself in my office. I have a rolled-up towel behind my lower back and I have a weighted scarf on my lap. As I felt this support, I noticed an immediate softening. It was like my body said, “Yes, please.” In 2022, I want more “yes pleases”. This is my body’s way of sharing with me that it feels safe.
#2: Accepting pain.
I’ve had a love-hate relationship with pain. You, too? The lesson has been in front of me from the beginning, and in 2022, I’m letting in something new around injury, pain and healing. Through the years, I’ve said to this pain over and over, please go away. I don’t want you. You’re in my way, you’re stopping me from getting what I want. I realized in my recent journaling that the conversation I’m having with and about the pain I’m experiencing is ALL lies. The “painful” truth is that in some ways, I’ve let my pain be a welcomed distraction. All of my appointments, all of the time and energy I’ve been spending trying to make my pain go away has been a way of me trying to fix my body. But the truth is, my body can be in pain and not be broken. Pain can just be information, not something that summons fear of my future or blame from my past. In 2022, pain is something that I can not only accept, but it’s also something I can choose for myself.
#3: Allowing myself the grace to be fully ME.
For decades. For as long as I can remember. I’ve been working to this higher standard that I believed I needed to meet. This standard, you can call it perfection, or you can call it impossible, consistently kicked my ass. Trying to achieve, work, and be this standard has been incredibly exhausting. I always felt like I was never doing enough and I should be doing more. Where did this standard come from? Why have I been designing my life to meet it? What price have I paid while trying? All good questions and ones that I’ll be answering in my next book (plans to publish in late 2022). Being fully me means that I work with my energy, genius and softness. Instead of trying so hard and proving myself, I’m putting my focus on living in a flow state of ease and gentleness. This feels foreign at times. And uncomfortable. Like when I rest in the middle of the day and let my body restore. Instead of pushing, I’m just tuning into myself and offering myself what I know I need. This feels light. And free.
#4: Continue to love my relationship with food.
Last night I was enjoying a brownie with milk. An old conversation crept in that said “you shouldn’t be eating this.” Noticing this was liberating. I’ve let go of so many food rules, and yet guilt can be an old familiar friend that likes to show up every once in a while. My motto continues to be “preference, not perfection”. I got this from my friend Jennifer Kreatsolous’s forthcoming book The Courageous Path to Healing. This motto offers me both guidance and confirmation. My food choices are mine to make. Perfection is something that I get to define. Diet culture tries to define perfect eating for us, but it’s fictitious. In 2022, I’m going to notice and cultivate my relationship with food because I know it will open up more personal growth and expansion.
#5: Exploring what’s nourishing.
In the past year or so, I’ve been sitting with what I’m consuming for movies, TV, videos and social media. I haven’t always had discernment around what feels good and what doesn’t. I’ve let in information just because it’s available. I’ve been passive and in some ways, asleep. But now, I shut that shit down if it doesn’t feel right. I notice what shows I like to watch, and what ones just don’t keep my interest or leave me feeling anxious. I’m paying attention to what books I like to read that fills me. I’m starting to notice all of the different interactions in my life that feel nourishing. It can be driving in my car, walking to the mailbox, or sipping warm tea. In 2022, exploring what’s nourishing for me is a way that I practice honoring my unique needs and desires.
How about you? Do you have any practices that you’ll start this year?